I am very excited to introduce our new blog category… interviews with working moms! Many thanks to Katherine Scott for speaking with me about how she balances being a mom of three and a busy career as a reporter for ABC Action News. Let’s get into it…

The Working Mom: ” Tell me a little about your working mom situation”

Katherine Scott:  “I am the mom of three. My oldest is 9, my middle child is 7 and my youngest is 4 1/2. We have an au pair who helps while my husband and I are at work. My work schedule is always early morning which is odd but consistent which really helps. I get in to work at 2:30 in the morning which means I get up at 1:45, get out of the house as quietly as possible and get make-up on once I get to the station.  I then work until mid-day. The time can vary, but it actually works really well to also allow me to be a mommy. I can be there for school pick-up. I can coach my daughter’s soccer team and be there for other after school activities.”

The Working Mom: ” So do you crash by a certain time in the evening since you are up so early and busy all day?”

Katherine Scott:  “My hope is…or my goal is to take a little nap when I get home in the afternoon. It doesn’t always happen. I also try to run to the gym and get some errands done before I go pick up the kids. When I don’t have the  nap, I can get very cranky😅. I can have a day or two without one, but when it’s more than that, it starts to catch up with me.”

The Working Mom: “So I understand your husband’s schedule as an orthopedic surgeon is also demanding, but are you able to share some of the responsibilities with the kids?”

Katherine Scott: “We kind of do different things. I am never there in the morning, so anything that needs to be done then, he is there (our au pair starts at 6am). I do a lot more driving since I am there in the afternoon. He does a lot more laundry and cleaning than I do, but I do a lot more of the day to day things with the kids…make lunches, take them to sports practice, etc.”

The Working Mom: “Was there ever a time you felt like you would prefer to stay home or perhaps take a sabbatical from work?”

Katherine Scott:  “I would miss my job. Maternity leaves were good spaces to take a break, recover and bond with my babies. Twelve weeks is a good amount of time, and I really liked that, but then I was ready to go back. I think it’s most intimidating with the first one, because you don’t really know what your life is going to look like. With the second and third, everyone folded into the plan and it works. I mean…I am tired…some weeks more tired than others, and it took a little time, but I think I have finally found a work/life balance…as much as you can have one.”😉

The Working Mom:  “What do you feel must be a priority with the kids? In other words, are there things you absolutely can’t miss?”

Katherine Scott: “The benefit of my hours is that I can be there for many things. But I do miss a lot of morning stuff, because I don’t have a job you can pop in and out of. Once you are there, you are 100% there, but I can do the afternoon stuff. I try to volunteer at the school library. I love doing that. I love being in the classroom when possible. I kind of like to always have them wonder… when is Mommy going to be around the corner? I can’t be there every day but I definitely try to get involved as much as I can. I have been classroom mom several times. I think it’s important to know the teachers and other people the kids see at school.”

The Working Mom: “Are there any pearls or strategies you can share that work particularly well for you to balance things on a day to day basis?”

Katherine Scott:  “A couple of things… One is that I’ve learned to realize when I am hitting my limit, and I will try to make a change at that point. I will take a day and go to work, but skip the gym or go to the gym and skip other errands I have. The other thing I read somewhere, just about stuff around the house, is to let the kids help you. Things may not get done perfectly, but still let them help you.  It takes something off your plate, it gets things done and it teaches them something.  I also try to appreciate the fact that they are still really young, and they are not going to be this young for much longer, so I try to get a kick out of whatever they do.”

The Working Mom: “Do you think the ability to manage work and family life gets harder or easier as the kids get older?” 

Katherine Scott: “I actually think it’s harder. On the one hand, the sleep situation is better, and that makes it easier in some ways. Consistent sleep helps and there are no more diapers and strollers and things like that, so the mobility is better. But now…it’s the activities! It is all over the place. And my youngest hasn’t even really started with this yet. You pick them up at school and that’s just when the day begins! It’s fun and I do love it, but between that and the social calendar, it is quite busy.”

The Working Mom: “Is there anything you would do differently when you first became a working mom based on what you have learned over the past nine years? Any advice you would give yourself as a first time mom?”

Katherine Scott: “First of all, I would tell myself to start planning earlier. Like with daycare, I waited until the eleventh hour not realizing there would be wait lists. I would have definitely started earlier. I also made some arbitrary decisions with my first one about things I thought were important, which ended up being stressful and maybe not as important as I thought (example given about how long to breastfeed). So I was kinder on myself with the next two.  I think you have to give yourself a break and realize you can’t do everything.”

The Working Mom: “Did you find there was a big difference in managing schedules and tasks when you went from having two to three children?”

Katherine Scott: “I think the transitions from zero to one and then one to two were the hardest. Then two to three… I feel like in some ways we had the most fun with him. I wasn’t nervous anymore. I knew what it was. I was a lot more low key about it. I do think it will be hard once he starts more activities.

The Working Mom: “Are you able to carve out any time for yourself? You mentioned the gym earlier.”

Katherine Scott: Yes! and I have found it’s really important. For a while I didn’t or I would make time and something would come  up and I would not do it.   I found this class I really like. It’s circuit training. It’s not long…30 minutes of intense work but mentally it makes me excited, and of course physically it’s good for me too. I’m super into it. I’m kind of obsessed with it!💪🏼

As the kids have gotten older, I also try to go out some with friends. It’s not often, but when we can do it, we have “mommy nights”. or just try to get together with friends and have a little fun. And, I started playing tennis a couple of summers ago. I don’t do it often. It’s fun. I drive all my kids to the activities, so I want to do something fun too. So even if it’s not all the time, that kind of thing has really helped me mentally and makes me feel healthier.

The Working Mom: “What happens when there is a conflict? If there is something you really want to do with or for your kids, but you cannot because of work, how does that affect you? How does it affect them?”

Katherine Scott:  “That has definitely happened. The good news is between me and my husband and also my mother…usually someone can be there, but there have been times when we can’t get someone there. That’s the reality. It stinks and I feel bad for them, but they know we all have jobs and they know that we are there every chance we get.  They know we have friends with kids in the same school or on the same team, and we explain that they are excited to send us pictures and videos of what we miss.  I think they accept that, but there are times when I hear the tiny voice that says ‘Mommy, I really want you to be there’ and my heart just breaks.”

The Working Mom: “In your opinion,do you think there is a way of truly finding work/life balance when you have a busy career and you are raising kids, especially multiple kids?”

Katherine Scott:  “I feel like lately I have found a good balance. It’s never going to be perfect, but I try to be present.

At work, I’m at work. I want to know if there is an emergency of course, or if someone just needs to call me that’s fine, but when I’m at work, I’m at work. When I’m at home, I’m at home. Sometimes I may have to do a little business at home, but I really try to separate them. I also feel like before I had kids, if I was stressed about something at work, I would come home still stressed about it and think about it until going back to work the next day, Now, I’m so busy, I can’t dwell on it. I think it’s knowing that not everything is going to be perfect and just doing the best that you can. I can be hard on myself sometimes, but I think I have gotten to the point where I am too tired to get upset about certain things. You just do what you can do. The fact of the matter is, I have a great relationship with the kids. I see them, I know what they’re doing, I know who their friends are…and work has been great about it. 

The Working Mom:  “Do you have some flexibility at work?”

Katherine Scott:  “Not really, once I’m at work, it’s not like I can just pop out for lunch.  But they understand. Everybody has their own family.  So if somebody is  sick and I can’t go, they understand. I have had this conversation with my news director about why I like the morning shift, and he’ll say… well, family is the most important thing… he has 3 kids of his own. It’s important to work somewhere where they understand that value. I also think it’s important that your kids see you doing something and contributing in some way.”

Thanks so much for sharing your experiences and advice with our working mom community!!💗

I will never forget how important it was to my parents that my brother and I receive the best education possible. To be a parent is to want the best for your child in every way, and you hope that you will be able to provide for them so that they can have even better opportunities than you did. You sacrifice when necessary in favor of “paying it forward”  just like your parents did for you.  In this way we hope that future generations continue to reap the benefits of those that came before, and you build a family which prospers well into the future. One could argue that in large part, the building blocks for this lie in a good education. 

There is a lot of variation in schools from public to private to parochial and all have different pros and cons. When I was younger, we moved around a lot and changed elementary schools more than once. My parents felt very strongly at the time that a private school education was best for my brother and I, and they worked extremely hard to make that happen. I am very grateful to them for sending me to Rutgers Preparatory School in New Jersey from grades 5-12. I had a wonderful experience there both in the classroom and on the lacrosse field. I was determined to make the most of this incredible opportunity, so I worked hard and did well in school. It is also key for the child to play his or her part in this process. Parents can provide opportunity and support, but ultimately this goes nowhere if the child doesn’t take full advantage of the situation. “Education is not received, it is achieved”

I went on to my first choice school, Haverford College in Pennsylvania, where I once again worked hard in the classroom and on the lacrosse field. This was the perfect place for me. A small school with a beautiful campus, excellent academics, a wonderful lacrosse program and only a couple of hours away from home. My parents once again worked very hard to provide this education for me at an amazing (and expensive) private college. I knew early on that I wanted to go to medical school, but there was not a true pre-med major at Haverford, so I ended up as a molecular biology major and graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree. Those four years did bring with them some ups and downs, but also a very defining moment which I did not realize as such at the time. During pre-season lacrosse practice my sophomore year, I injured my knee which ultimately required surgery, and I missed the whole season that year. I was a devastated 19 year old at the time, but I had the incredible good fortune to meet an extraordinary orthopaedic surgeon, Dr. Larry Miller who performed my knee surgery on April 5, 1991 (almost 31 years ago😱). He had also attended Haverford College and was serving as the team physician there at that time. I recovered well and went on to play two more seasons as a team captain and then two years of club lacrosse after college as well. I am grateful to him for the excellent work on my knee, but perhaps even more grateful for what was still to come…

While at Haverford, I was exposed to the world of athletic training. Lacrosse is a spring sport, but did have “fall ball” as well. I was only off from playing my sport during the winter season, and I worked as a student athletic trainer during that time. This was in large part inspired by my own rehabilitation after surgery.  I worked with our men’s basketball team during the winter seasons of my last two years of college, and it made me think about possibly considering a career in physical therapy instead. I decided to take a year “off”  after graduating from college, and during that time I worked as the assistant to the head athletic trainer at Haverford. I was also able to shadow my orthopaedic surgeon Dr, Miller in his office and occasionally in the operating room as well. He was gracious enough to let me come on a very regular basis that whole year and it “sealed the deal”.  During that time I had actually applied to both medical school and physical therapy school, but there was no question in my mind that medical school was the right choice. It had been the right decision from the start, but my time with Dr. Miller convinced me for sure.  In May of 1998, I graduated from the Medical College of Pennsylvania (now Drexel) and went on to an orthopaedic surgery residency program at Allegheny General Hospital in Pittsburgh.

During my residency, I was fortunate to work with many wonderful surgeons and my fellow residents were all great guys as well.  Completing five years of residency during which time I also had my two children and experienced the break-up of my marriage was not an easy task. It was a tremendous accomplishment for me, but I could have never done this without help. My residency graduation was a very meaningful night which I was so happy to celebrate with my parents who gave me the most amazing foundation all those years ago with my education at Rutgers Prep and Haverford. They literally came to my rescue as my marriage ended and allowed me to finish my residency on time by being there for me and my daughters with full time love, support and child care. Dr. Mark Baratz, our residency director at the time and Dr. Rob Dawson, my co-resident for five years are two more people I am forever grateful to for incredible support always.  Throughout those five years I also kept in close touch with Dr. Miller who was a constant source of encouragement and guidance.  I knew fairly early during residency that I wanted to subspecialize in sports medicine (shoulder and knee surgery primarily). This was also Dr. Miller’s specialty, and he was one of the attending surgeons at the Thomas Jefferson University orthopaedic surgery sports medicine fellowship in Philadelphia.  We apply for fellowships during our 4th year of residency, and I was thrilled to be offered a position at the Jefferson fellowship. I would then do the last year of my training under my former surgeon and forever mentor. 

Fellowship year (2003-2004) was challenging but also amazing. I worked under three other surgeons as well, but perhaps felt the most stressed when I was working with Dr. Miller. We now laugh about how I cried one day in the OR because I was so frustrated about not doing as well as I felt he wanted me to. “There’s no crying in orthopedics”🤣 This is mostly true, but with the connection we had, I wanted nothing more than to do excellent work all the time and make him proud. I felt like we were coming full circle now…starting with shadowing him before I was even in medical school to being scrubbed in and operating side by side during the final year of my training. 

I think I just got goose bumps.😉 

The story is far from over, but I can wrap up the last 18 years in these final paragraphs. I started in practice in 2004 at a small hospital very close to my home as an employed physician. I was starting off by myself which is not the ideal situation, but it builds strength and character pretty quickly. I had to figure things out without the benefit of partners or any other orthopedic surgeons around me in the same hospital…it was just me. But what I always had (and still to this day have) was the ability to pick up the phone and hear Larry Miller’s voice on the other end. 

My very first case in practice was an autograft ACL reconstruction. It is one of the more technically demanding cases we learn how to do in sports medicine and ironically the same surgery Dr. Miller had done on me all those years ago. A defining moment at that time and another defining moment at this time. Huge thank you to Dr, Miller for his role in  both of these. He spent an hour with me on the phone the night before reviewing every step of the procedure and every possible pitfall. I went into surgery the next day feeling confident with his voice still in my head, and I did it! It took me about three times as long to do the procedure as it does now, but it was a success! I called him when I was done and we celebrated the victory! Several months later we were on the phone discussing another case and I mentioned what I would be doing for my birthday a few days later. He said “wait….Saturday…May 22….that’s your birthday?…It’s my birthday too!”🥳. After already knowing each other for 13 years, we never realized we shared the same birthday. So from then on, every year, in late May, we have dinner together to celebrate our birthday. It has been an amazing tradition which we even held up in May of 2020 with a drink together over FaceTime when all the restaurants were closed. Some years we don’t get to see each other except for that dinner, but some years we manage to catch up at other orthopedic events we have in common or squeeze another dinner into our busy schedules. I think we always drive our server crazy because we easily talk non-stop for 20-30 minutes before even glancing at the menu.

I joined my current group in 2006, and Dr. Miller was also instrumental in making that decision. He helped me every step of the way and he knew the guys I would be joining. In fact he said it was the only group he would let me join in the area because he knew they were good surgeons and good people. He was right…of course he was right…he has looked out for me and given me only the best advice from day one. Despite his extremely demanding schedule, he has always been just a call or text away. Throughout my almost 18 years in practice, I have tossed the lifeline out to him on a handful of occasions to get his advice on  patients as well. The beauty of us practicing in the same geographic region is that I could also send a patient to see him when I needed his help. We know many people in common in the industry, and it is the best feeling when he lets me know that others tell him about my reputation  and the good work that I am doing.  I know he is proud of what I have accomplished, and there is no better way to show my appreciation for all that he has given me than to take great care of patients and put the skills he gave me to use. He is approaching retirement later this year and we just had and “extra” dinner together a few nights ago in celebration of this. What a wonderful time we had, He is truly one of a kind and has had a huge impact on the lives of so many from patients, to students, to residents, fellows, and colleagues. His impact will be felt far and wide for many, many years to come. I am so fortunate to have this special relationship with him and the most amazing mentor ever.  My advice…education is a gift…cherish those who give it..parents and mentors alike.

With much love, admiration and appreciation, this post is dedicated to Larry Miller, M.D. 💙 See you in May!🥂

Do we as working moms have the same opportunities as males in the work force or even as females who don’t have kids? I guess it depends on who you ask. Many employers have concerns about women with children or even women without children who will likely decide to have them in the future. There are concerns about maternity leaves which, by the way barely exist anymore, and then how the responsibilities of being a mom will impact performance at work. There may be concerns about whether or not the individual will even return to work after having kids. Of course there are many variables which play into these scenarios, but the other thing to consider is how desirable a working mom can be as an employee. 35 million of us prove this every day in the United States!

Who is better at multitasking and problem solving on the fly than a mom? We play so many roles on a daily basis and have to be good at making plans and staying organized. We pay attention to details but don’t get too wrapped up in them if it means we get off task. We want to do things to the best of our ability, but we also realize that on any given day, “the enemy of good is better”.  We understand the value of time and try not to waste it. We prioritize and focus on what is critical to get done each day. We can manage long range goals as well, but we are very good on tackling what is right in front of us because there is simply no other option. 

When asked “how do you do it all?”, I would expect the majority of working moms to respond “some days I’m not really sure, but like Nike says…I just do it”! There is no perfect system which works for each day as they may bring different challenges based on so many different factors. I think moms can adapt quickly and create some type of solution to most problems that arise. These types of traits develop more over time and even more so in moms of multiple kids trying to juggle all of their needs. Of course most moms, especially working moms, must have some type of support, whether it’s a spouse, grandparents or other family members, or some other type of additional childcare. Clearly we cannot be two places at once, so this cannot be done all on our own. However the amount that we manage on our own creates habits and a true work ethic which can translate into very desirable characteristics for an employer. So rather than overlook a working mom for fear that she will be less reliable or less focused, I think in many cases the employer needs to realize she will be potentially the best candidate for all the reasons mentioned above. We can do it all and do it just as well as those who aren’t moms as long as we are given a chance to try. 

You can add to this list doctor, lawyer, teacher or whatever work you choose to do outside the home….and of course you must always complete the list with “wonder woman”😉💪🏼

I will never get tired of this view during a Carbon Leaf concert at World Cafe Live in Philadelphia.  If you saw yesterday’s post, you have been introduced to my love for this band. I took a little trip down memory lane yesterday with photos from concerts over the years starting in 2009 and ending in 2019. I first saw Carbon Leaf live in 2007, and it was the first time I ever went to World Cafe Live. Little did I know this amazing venue was going to take on such a special significance for me. Carbon Leaf plays there every year the first Friday or Saturday night in December. It is usually the kick off concert to a string of holiday shows they do regularly leading up to Christmas. This venue has a really cool mezzanine level which lends itself well to private parties. I took advantage of this starting in 2011. I rented out the mezzanine and hosted a private party for anywhere from 50-90 people. It became the most amazing tradition, and I have had many friends and co-workers come back to the party year after year. My daughters started coming to the party in 2014, and it became a very special night for them too. As they got older they would each bring a friend and it was a night they would look forward to. I was thrilled that they were always so excited about it. In 2018, my older daughter was a freshman in college in Boston. She had been home for Thanksgiving the weekend before the concert. She went back to Boston for the week and then flew back literally 5 days later to come to this party…that’s dedication!! 

The band was always kind enough to come up to the party for a little while before the show and mingle with my guests. They would give us a nice “shout out” during the concert as well. This year would have been the 10th annual party on the mezzanine, but sadly, like so many other events over the past several months, it could not happen. I am very hopeful we can celebrate the 10th year of the party in a big way in 2021!!🥂

The World Cafe Live event definitely evolved into something super special, but I think there is nothing more special than having Carbon Leaf come play a concert at our home. We have been lucky enough to have this happen three times! I am hoping it will happen again in the future. The first house party/concert was in 2015. The plan was for a gathering of about 20 people in early June. We have a great outdoor space so we got a tent and a caterer and spent the whole week leading up to the party preparing. The day before it was all hands on deck with my family getting our yard and patio area perfectly manicured and ready for the big event. The morning of the party the skies opened up and it poured down rain all day and night. I was devastated. Luckily we have a finished basement which ended up being the perfect indoor space for this intimate concert. The band was so great and assured me it would be a really cool vibe for  this small acoustic show. They were right and an amazing time was had by all! The girls also had  guitar lessons earlier in the day. So special!🥰

We had such an amazing time, we knew we wanted to do it again. We made plans for May of 2016. The same preparation took place…and the rain came AGAIN!! I was less upset this time because I knew how well it turned out the year before. This year the rain did taper off near the end of the concert, so we actually all went out on the patio for the last couple of songs, and it was a really cool way to end the show. Another special treat this year was my younger daughter actually joining in with the band for a song on the guitar. So proud!!👏🏻

Last summer we had the third house party/concert in June. Third time was the charm with regard to the weather! We went for it again with high hopes of finally doing it outside and it happened. The guest list was bigger this year so it was the perfect time for the weather to cooperate! Every party, concert and experience with this band has been amazing, but June 1, 2019 is definitely one of the most special times we have ever had. It was incredible day from start to finish filled with great friends, great music and so much fun. You may have noticed in the pictures above, we usually have a special cake for the parties (or cupcakes at World Cafe Live), and I would have to say the bakery I use outdid themselves with the cake for this party as you will see below!🎸 

So there is a very full Fun Friday post!! Everyone in my family loves music and enjoys concerts so much. Carbon Leaf has a very special place in our lives and in our hearts. We have had so much fun for many years thanks to this amazing band! This post is dedicated with much love and appreciation to Barry, Terry, Carter, Jon, Jason (& now Jesse too)🧡